yandao.com - Memoirs of a player wannabe

*start rant*

OMGWTF – I scratched my MacBook Pro (which I’ve lovingly taken care off since like Day Zero of purchase) on some stupid metal railing around RP’s canteen. Now there’s a very disturbingly, eye-soring, and UGLY 2mm scratch on the lid.

For those of you who *don’t* own a Mac, well, think of it as a nice diamond – perfectly cut, shiny, and glamorous – and then there’s a silly scratch right slap in the middle of it, which takes away like 90% of the glamour. And it’s 2 millimetres some more! *coughs* =X

*end of rant*

Okay, seriously, I saw this message spread around on my Facebook buy a gal called Dwayne Yu – and.. I don’t remember her name – but I think I saw the face somewhere… so, well, I’ll give due credit of it to her, and wherever she got it from:

A business man met a beautiful girl and asked her to spend the night with him for $500. And she did.

Before he left in the morning, he told her that he did not have any cash with him, but that he would have his secretary write a cheque and mail it to her, calling the payment “RENT FOR APARTMENT.”
On the way to the office, he regretted what he had done, realizing that the whole event was not worth the price. So he had his secretary send a cheque for $250 and enclosed a note:

Dear Madam:
Enclosed find a cheque in the amount of $250 for rent of your apartment. I am not sending the amount agreed upon because when I rented the apartment I was under the impression that:
(1) it had never been occupied;
(2) that there was plenty of heat;
(3) that it was small enough to make me cozy and at home Last night, however, I found out that it had been previously occupied, that there wasn’t any heat, and that it was entirely too large.

Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately returned the cheque for $250 with the following note:

Dear Sir, First of all,
(1) I cannot understand how you expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely.
(2) As for the heat, there is plenty of it if you know how to turn it on.
(3) Regarding the space, the apartment is indeed of regular size, but if you don’t have enough furniture to fill it, please don’t blame the landlord.

Moral of the story: Don’t rent beautiful apartment if your furniture too little!

Edit: I mixed up Dwayne’s gender. My bad, I didn’t click her Facebook profile. Apologies, Dwayne. Paiseh!