yandao.com - Memoirs of a player wannabe

Its amazing when someone lies to themselves without even blinking, as a matter of fact I lie to myself every so often, and personally, no offence, but I would think you do that, too; be it on purpose or unknowingly.

Before we start, allow me to share a little about my academic background in secondary school, first. I do think it's about time I told about my past, even though I'm used to saying that one's past is irrelevant:

• - Invited to principal's office at least once every two weeks for doing silly things – such as messing with someone's Hotmail account, or provoking that big, ugly guy into a fight
• - Attended only 28 out of 180+ days in school for the whole of Secondary 4 – O-Levels year, mind you.
• - Too lazy to submit practical paper for a specific subject for O-Levels, hence, flunked it with an ABSENT grade.
• ..and loads of other shady stuff…

Hence, I told myself, that I needed a change in life, and so, I thought back to that motivational seminar years ago, and drew up this list of goals, on some semi-discarded piece of notebook paper. Wow – your life goals on a piece of scrap =X:

1. Goal #1. Become the top student of the school – yes, I know, its very dreamy…
2. Goal #2. Get recognition and position for everything I do – be it just a simple blog, or a presentation, or just a small project
3. Goal #3. Make $10,000/monthly by 18 years old

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Ok. Realistic goals, but seemingly difficult to achieve. Back to the topic:

Basically, the logic behind self-deception comes when people want to justify something they do, which is grossly wrong, or obsene, even in the tiniest proportions, such as, what I'm doing now, staying up late, "researching" on a little stuff for this post (which you should see later on – below) and well, trying to refrain from very inviting thoughts of a place nearby you

- the one whereby you seem to drift into after your back eases into the matterss and your eyelids decide to tumble… You then begin to reach a state of calmness, where it seems you're free to do as you please, and your desires are conjoured before your very eyes…and that place, so meticulously described, is the very same place which holds you back when the buzzer on your cellular phone attempts to take control of the very first thing you do in the morning – waking up.

Then comes the greatest deception of yourself, the one which your innermost hopes are built up on – the hopes in which you were never aware existed.

If you would, close your eyes for a second, and ask yourself these:

Why are you hoping for things to turn out the way you want it to?

Why, is there even a preference of liking, for certain people in your life? Perhaps, at certain points of time, more than just a thought?

What are you going to school for? An achievement? Recognition? Compliance – following the advice of someone influential enough to you? Besides yourself? Perhaps people close to you?

What are you working towards to, then? Money? Friends? Family? or is it just a sense of satisfaction when Success arrives?

What do you want, ultimately, at the end of this journey of physical desires, and goals?

Then again, Are you really satisfied with yourself with just that?

What if that you can achieve twice or even thrice as much, just by knowing how to do so?

To be frank, I have a perfect Grade Point Average (GPA) of 4.0 for the previous semester, and I've already completed my Creative Engagement (CE) Requirements within the first semester of year 1 in Republic Polytechnic? For those who aren't in the school, the GPA is somewhat like score for your performance, from 0 to 4 – the higher the better, and CE would refer to points chalked up for attending events, talks and other courses or workshops designed out-of-the-classroom.

Besides that, as of the day before yesterday, I am now able to sign off in my e-mails as "President" of a specific Interest Group, which currently has an intake of around 120 members. Yes, that also means e-mails to external corporations, school departments, and other "clubs" of the school. And yes, that feeling is great

Now, what if I told you that you could do the same for yourself?

…that it's NOT about what you know
…that it's NOT about what you can do
…that it's NOT about how much time you have
…that it's NOT about how knowledgable you are

But rather, it's about how you're willing to make the effort to try to get where you want!

That is what people look out for – HOW you got up there, not WHAT you are up there now as! People get motivated and inspired by successful others, for the very reason that those successful often seem to take the long, hard path to do so - They see a flimsy ladder leading to the top of a cliff, they know the ladder might fall at anytime and that they might have to climb up all over again, but still, they grab on to each rung, and pull themselves to the top. Only then, will they be able to feel the cool, refreshing breeze against their faces!

Do you want to get where you've always wanted to in life, maybe even in this miniature environment?

That's 2 out of 3 goals achieved, for me. When is the next one going to be fufilled? – When will you start working on yours?

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Now, look at it this way. Maybe you've been telling yourself bad, negative things, that goals are lies, lies that will only occur in dreams and fantasies. But if that was true, then I'd just be relying on a very "reliable" lie to get myself where I am now, wouldn't I?

Think about it, and let me know in the Comments page if you're interested in working together, we can even form a team to help one another achieve their goals and wants! (click the "0 Comments" link, and have your say!)